I'm getting blue pants in the morning, ding dong, the zipper's gonna shine!

If ever there is something to momentarily lose your shit over, it's climbing into the shower and looking down to realize you are now blue below the waist, thanks to the dye transference from your new jeans.

(I mean, I figured that out eventually, but for the first few horrified seconds, I was wondering what horrible disease was going to be named after me and if Smurfs would figure into it. I looked like Violet Beauregard had only chewed half a stick of gum. I was like, good gracious, ass is bodacious...ly blue.)

Tomorrow is my last day at work, and I have to write a bunch of thank you cards and make them sound heartfelt, and that is probably going to take ALL my best lying skills, so-- early sign off tonight.