I met a really nice exotic dancer at Hugh's bachelor party.

Back from New Orleans. This is my first time doing a Maid of Honor gig, and I'm kind of unfamiliar with the whole thing, so honestly I was trying to just find a balance of "Keyser Soze enabler" and "don't let anyone get a face tattoo." I'm not a very good event planner; I don't have an eye for, like, party favors or decoration or themes. I prefer to be the person who shows up with food and/or booze, and then skulks in the background. But this went off well enough, I suppose. No one ended up in the hospital (that I know of), or vomited in a public place (ditto previous comment), and once you get past those two hurdles I think you're pretty much golden. If, unlike my cousin, you can also avoid passing out in the Pat O'Brien's fountain while shirtless and wearing a showercap that you bought off a random dude for twenty bucks and subsequently getting banned from the premises, you are a winner. You are the one who wins.

( Turn the goddamn music up! My heart feels like an alligator! )

This was supposed to have been a music post for Baco (originally, the inspiration and theme were how much sports were pissing me off, but Baco is more important than sports, so she gets credit for the inspiration now), but I'll do that later this week.